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ARCHIVES
Noble November Deep, December 2003
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Issue 17 - 2003-11-26
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NOBLE NOVEMBER
DEEP DECEMBER
SARK's E Letter (e stands for energy)
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“Oh heart, if one should say to you that the
soul perishes like the body, answer that
the flower withers, but the seed remains.”
Kahil Gibran
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MARVELOUS MARJORIE
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Just before leaving for England and Italy at the end
of September, I felt very worried that my Mom would
die while I was far away. Finally, I said to her,
”Mom, what if you die while I’m in Italy?” and she
replied, “Well, I’ll be just as dead as if you were
here!”
She insisted I go on the trip. I got an international
cell phone “just in case.” Before leaving, I visited
Bibbo, my deeply spiritual Brazilian hairdresser. I
told him about my Mom’s recent near-death
experiences, and he spun me around in the chair
and looked straight into my eyes.
“Susan. This is the 4th time you told me that your
Mom has nearly died. I think it is time that you stop
trying to bring her back to life with your light. Stop
praying for her life and start praying for her dignity.”
Then he resumed cutting my hair. I had tears in my
eyes and felt the truth of his words.
Just a week before, I’d gotten a call from my mother’s
care manager that “things didn’t look good,” that my
mother was not doing well. I called the nursing home
and with tears in my eyes, asked if she was able to
speak on the phone. The man who answered said he’d
get her, and I waited and prayed that she’d be able to
speak.
Next thing, I heard her laughing and saying “thank you”
to the man who handed her the phone. I was just
astonished and said, “Mom, I heard you were in really
bad shape.” She said, “No, I am just fine.”
I asked her what she was doing, and she replied, “I’m
sitting here eating a baloney sandwich and talking to
you!”
I cried with relief, and told her that I was afraid
she had started to die.
“Oh, you are so dramatic!” she said.
I traveled to England and had a gorgeous time with
the UK Succulents – what a brave and beautiful tribe
of women! I fell deeply and unexpectedly in love with
London, too.
Next I went to Italy, to Lucca (in Tuscany) to meet my
friend Tanya, and to join my friends Jennifer and Pado
in matrimony. It was a dream, a movie, an emotional
symphony. I felt so honored to pronounce them
wife and husband.
I had a long talk with my Mom the day after the wedding.
She wanted to hear all the details about that, and my time
in Italy. I told her I had played bocce ball that day.
She said, “I’ve just found out that it’s not called bocce
ball, because bocce means ball, so that is redundant!”
We laughed that she was correcting me on my Italian
from her house in Minneapolis, Minnesota.
She had gotten out of the nursing home and was at
home. I asked her how it felt and she said, “Oh, just
*wonderful.*
Two days later I got a call from my brother Andrew who
said that she “wasn’t doing well” and that he was flying
there. I immediately called, and her caregivers said
she hadn’t talked in ten hours. I said, “Please hold the
phone up to her ear. Maybe she’ll be able to hear me.”
Her voice was strong and clear.
“Hi, Susan!”
I asked her how she was feeling, that I’d heard she
wasn’t doing well. She replied with great determination:
“Oh, this isn’t serious!”
I said it sounded like it was. I asked her if it felt like
she was dying and she said
“No!”
I told her I was coming back from Italy and she said,
“I love you.
I love you.
I love you.”
I hurriedly packed and got to the airport, to find out that
I had to take a bus to another city 2 ½ hours away because
of mechanical difficulties. I got onto the bus, and
immediately noticed sunlight flooding into the window
(it had been very stormy before that). It flashed into
my mind just then that my Mom had died.
My cell phone rang and it was my brother Andrew.
“Mom just died.”
I began sobbing as the bus pulled out and sat in
near-hysteria. The world then really rolled out the
beauty. It was as if I was being shown all the beauty
in the world to fill me. We traveled along mountain
roads, through tunnels, past fields of bright purple
and yellow wild flowers and the sun gleamed so brightly.
I cried all the way to London and across the Atlantic
Ocean and across the United States to Minneapolis,
Minnesota. I am still crying.
This is the deepest grief and the biggest loss I have
ever known. As the shock subsides and a new reality
comes into focus, I am astonished by the pain of it.
I had some illusion that I was “prepared” from all the
care giving, or from experiencing my father’s death in
1996.
If I was prepared, it didn’t save me from massive grief.
Here’s what I’ve learned or experienced so far:
~~~It doesn’t matter how old someone was or how sick
they were. The loss is no less.
~~~The worst thing is people who don’t say anything
about the person or their death.
~~~Nothing can touch the pain, but large and small
kindnesses can ease the suffering.
~~~People are sometimes really scared of death and
of grieving and try to avoid it.
~~~I am so incredibly grateful for every card, message,
phone call, flower, tribute or mention that I’ve received.
~~~I wish I’d been able to comfort and care for grieving
people earlier in my life.
~~~There are angels all along the way.
~~~I hope people ask me how I am doing about my grief
for a very long time.
I have also experienced many “gifts of death” aka “G.O.D.”
Some of the gifts I’ve received as a result of my mother’s
death:
~~~My friend and brother’s girlfriend Tanya flying from Italy
to be with us for the memorial service and after. She was
utterly selfless, compassionate and kind.
~~~My mother’s sister Phyllis coming to the service.
~~~My older brother Roger going into detox, and then
a nutrition-based alcohol treatment program. He is
flourishing and sounding alive again.
Many of you know that I play a game called “Magpie”
with the dictionary. You ask a question and open randomly
to a word or words, as your answer.
I decided to “ask” my mother about her experience with
death. The first word I chose was
NOT
I asked for more explanation, and the next word I chose was
SERIOUS
Thank you to each soul who posted a message for me on
the Glorious Guestbook or sent me a card. I read them
and cried. Thank you. I also reread those messages.
My Mother was greatly helped by an organization called
Senior Abilities Unlimited which helps elders stay mobile or
be able to walk again. www.seniorabilitiesunlimited.com.
If you feel moved to make a donation in honor of my mother
(any size welcome), they’ll use the funds to help other
people.
Attention: Marvelous Marjorie Fund
Senior Abilities Unlimited, LLC
6603 Queen Avenue South, Ste. A
Richfield, MN 55423
I’ve been very moved by the following resources, and wish
to extend my love especially to every grieving person, and
to the friends and families of those people.
Sending my love to each of you,
Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy aka SARK
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RESOURCES
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BOOKS
“How To Go On Living When Someone You Love Dies”
Therese A. Rando
WEBSIGHTS
www.griefnet.org
www.healingenvironments.com
www.lifechallenges.org
About my monthly e letter: The “e” stands for energy.
My intention is to infuse you with fresh energy, and
nourish you with quotes, book recommendations,
insights, and places I am floundering.
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SARK’S INSPIRED PRODUCT COLLECTION
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SARK has NEW products in time for gift-giving.
At www.campsark.com/pages/new_products.php
you can order:
~~~~ SARK’s 2004 Daily Boxed calendar –
Share SARK's daily whimsical and powerful
musings on life, complemented by her equally
whimsical art.
~~~~ SARK’s 2004 Wall calendar –
Share SARK's whimsical and powerful
musings on life, reminding you to experience
more pleasure, love imperfectly, and swing
as high as you can on a swing set by
moonlight!
~~~~ SARK’s Juicy Living Cards
Bring you 100 simple ways to practice
more self-love and "Juicy Living." SARK shows
you new ways of looking at subjects such as
time, love, and money, as well as support for
our "splendid imperfections.” It’s all about
living spontaneously and creatively. These
cards are thick, glossy, double-sided, luminous
messages for your soul.
At the Magic Cottage Store
www.campsark.com/pages/store.php,
you can still order all SARK’s Inspired
Product Collection including products
through Femail Creations.
Impact also carries SARK products.
Call 1-800-322-4810 for a catalog or
more information.
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ORDERING SARK'S BOOKS
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Pre-order SARK’s Spring 2004 book,
“Make Your Creative Dreams REAL
A Plan for Procrastinator's, Perfectionists,
Busy People, Avoiders, and People Who Would
Rather Sleep All Day
at www.campsark.com/pages/new_products.php
and it will be on your doorstep like a beam of light.
Order SARK 11 other books online
at www.campsark.com/pages/books.php
through Amazon.com
Find SARK books at your favorite bookstore,
or at the library, where you might find SARK
staring hypnotically at books, wearing her pajamas.
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SARK SPEAKS! YOU ARE INVITED
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SARK is beginning 2004 with 2 exciting speaking events.
Check out the details and links
at www.campsark.com/pages/Workshop.php
Saturday, February 7, 1-4 p.m.: Sedona Creative Life,
Sedona, Arizona. The event organizers tell us tickets
have already been sold and they expect to be sold out
long before the event. This will be ”An Afternoon with
SARK” and Karen Drucker will be playing music!
Thursday, March 4, 2004: Appleton, WI, 11:10am
SARK will be speaking at Lawrence University as a part
of their Convocation Lecture Series in the Lawrence
Memorial Chapel. Open to the public. SARK’s topic will
be “Make Your Creative Dreams REAL.”
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INTERNATIONAL ADVENTURES
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My friend Karen Drucker is offering this
"Sea of Inspiration" and I am recommending it.
You need to sign up very soon!
CRUISE THE MEXICAN RIVIERA!
Recording artist Karen Drucker (www.karendrucker.com)
Best-Selling author Rev. David Ault (www.davidault.com)
and internationally acclaimed soul intuitive Eddie Connor
(www.eddieconner.com) are three of the most exciting new
faces on the New Thought/Inspirational scene today! These
vibrant and gifted motivators are creating an unforgettable
7-Night Mexican Riviera Cruise (March 21-28, 2004).
Sail Into Your Soul -- A Journey Into Bliss is your unforgettable
opportunity to create your personal heaven with surrounding
beauty and inspirational teaching -- includes ports of call in
Puerto Vallarta, Mazatlan and Cabo San Lucas. With prices
starting as low as $735, this amazingly affordable cruises
will fill up fast. Visit the above websights for further information
or contact Paul Capiral at CruiseOne 888-898-9815 to sign
up today.
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SARK IN THE NEWS
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For SARK interviews by New Balance magazine,
Femail Creations and LifeChallenges.org,
visit www.campsark.com/pages/news.php.
SARK’s book EAT MANGOES NAKED will
appear in a movie entitled MOVE! USA.
Visit www.hopecouragejustice.com .
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SERENDIPITY
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To “Lounge and Chat” on the Marvelous Message Board,
visit www.campsark.com/pages/lounge.php .
To send a message to SARK, visit Glorious Guestbook
at www.campsark.com/vmt/guestbook/guestbook.php .
If you wish to receive responses from other SARK readers,
please post on the Marvelous Message Board.
Micromovements are fun & easy and cause huge creative
growth. Download your MicroMOVEment Worksheet
at www.campsark.com/pages/downloads.php .
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CAMP SARK WEB DEVELOPMENTS
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Watch for updates on SARK's eStore, New Products
& Virtual Events in 2004!
Also coming soon: a “Books SARK Loves” page!
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SARK’S INSPIRATION LINE
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SARK invites you to take pleasure and inspiration
from her FREE 5 minute recorded message.
SARK changes the message “when the spirit moves her;”
so check back regularly. The Inspiration Line
welcomes 5,000 international callers monthly and
is in its tenth year.
415-546-3742 (EPIC) 24 hours
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CAMP SARK INFORMATION LINE
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Call the Camp SARK Information Line to catch up
on the latest SARK news, products and upcoming
appearances.
415-397-7275 [SARK] 24 hours
SUBSCRIPTION INFORMATION
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I am sending you this e letter because you subscribed.
Have your friends visit www.campsark.com to subscribe.
If you wish to unsubscribe or have difficulties,
mailto:delicious2003@campsark.com.
If you change your e-mail address, please
unsubscribe your former e-mail address
and subscribe your new one!
THANK YOU!
Copyright (c) 2003 SARK.
All rights reserved.
Permission is granted to reproduce, copy or
distribute this e-letter, so long as this copyright
notice and full information attributing SARK is attached.
Delicious Campsark: http://www.campsark.com |
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